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Original Airdate: 02/02/98
The Camden's are all decked out in their good clothes and are seated at a restaurant run by a member of the church, Mr. Harrison. Mary suddenly looks at Lucy's sweater and realizes that it is hers – and she has never even worn it. Ruthie, meanwhile, is finding ways to entertain herself and picks up a bottle of tabasco sauce and accidentally splatters Lucy, which just makes Mary even angrier. The waitress, Harriet, arrives and asks for their orders. One by one the Camdens have their orders rejected for one reason or another since there are no substitutions to the platters listed on the menu. When Annie mentions the free meal coupons from Mr. Harrison, Harriet asks to inspect them and then informs everyone that the coupons are only good for the blue plate special – which today is liver and onions. Annie says they will take the onions and then emphasizes that they will enjoy it.The next morning, Annie makes breakfast for everybody and is disappointed at the way Simon doesn't say thank you or how Lucy just assumes that Annie will wash the sweater for her. Annie sets the kids down and gives them a lesson in manners and proper behavior – like saying please and thank you. She warns the kids she is going on a good manners binge.
When Mary goes to school, she gets a hold of the school paper where she finds a personal ad placed with the family's phone number. She can't believe that Matt actually placed the ad. Matt walks by and notices all the girls looking at him and smiling – but he has no clue why everyone is behaving the way they are. Later, when Matt finally notices the personal ad, he interrogates Mary and Lucy and accuses them of placing the ad for them. They both plead innocent.
When the mail comes, Annie is surprised to find a catalog of dog products from Eddie Bowser, along with a credit card in Happy's name. She laughs and promptly throws the catalog and card in the trash. When Simon comes home from school and takes the trash out, he and Ruthie notice the catalog and the credit card and sneak it back up to their room.
Today, Eric is volunteering at a local food bank when a boy comes up to him and asks where the Beanie Weenies are. Eric admits he doesn't know, and goes to ask another worker at the food bank. Eric finds out that the boy, Clarence, comes in all the time and just grabs a can of Beenie Weenies. Clarence finds the canned good, and as he is leaving opens the door for someone, and then tells everybody thanks. Eric decides to follow Clarence home to get his story. When he gets to Clarence's apartment building, some tough looking guys in the hallway stop him and he holds the bible up in defense – the tough guys leave. He finds Clarence's apartment and knocks on the door, but Clarence says he isn't supposed to open the door for anybody – but he asks Eric to stay and talk with him from the hallway until his mom gets home.
Up in his room, Simon and Ruthie look through the catalog and notice some bright red rain boots for dogs. They decide to order the boots just to see if it's for real. They call the 800 number and manage to order the red boots – plus $10 for overnight service. After they place the order, Simon calls the customer service line and tries to cancel the order, but the representative notices Simon isn't over 18, so she can't help him.
Lucy tries to wash Mary's sweater, following the directions carefully. After the dryer stops, she removes the sweater and finds it is now Ruthie's size. Mary is obviously even angrier and tells Lucy she has to take it back and get her money back.
Clarence's mom comes home and starts hitting Eric over the head trying to get him away from her door. Eric looks up and is surprised to find the Clarence's mom is Harriet from the restaurant. She invites him in and tells him her story. She says hr husband left them after filing their joint tax returns, then she found out he was married to someone else at the same time. She says even though their marriage wasn't legal, the IRS told her she was responsible for the money he owed the government. Harriet tells him the IRS kept freezing their bank accounts to try and get her to pay, and finally she had to take 2 jobs to make the payments, plus move into the bad neighborhood. Eric offers to call the IRS and talk to her caseworker, Mr. Smith – but Harriet isn't very optimistic. The next day, Eric calls Mr. Smith on his cell phone from the IRS building and uses his ears to locate Mr. Smith's office. He sits down and starts to talk.
At school, Matt corners the editor of the school paper and asks him to print a retraction. The editor refuses, claiming he can't reveal his sources and it was not an error. Matt threatens him with going to the principal, to which the editor replies that he is protected by the Constitution and in turn threatens Matt that HE will go to the principal if Matt doesn't get off his case.
Annie gets the mail and finds a box and is surprised when she opens it and finds some bright red doggie rain boots. Upon calling the Eddie Bowser company, she is informed that dogs can't place orders – if her dog placed the order, she has a very smart dog. Annie wants to cancel the credit card but is told that the paperwork is a lot of work and not worth everyone's time. After hanging up, Annie is surprised that a customer service representative can be so rude.
Lucy gets a ride to the mall to return the sweater, however when she tries to talk to the salesperson, she realizes she doesn't have the receipt. The salesperson refuses to give Lucy the money for the sweater, exchange it OR give her store credit. Lucy leaves, wondering how Mary will take it.
Mr. Smith goes over the case with Eric and tells him that he will be retiring in 2 weeks, and then the case won't be his anymore. Eric says he then has 2 weeks to try and fix the mistake. Mr. Smith reinforces that it is not Eric's problem, and he should stay out of it. In the middle of the argument, Mr. Smith grabs his chest and says he is having a heart attack. Eric jumps up and dials 911. When they get to the hospital, the nurse refuses to admit him because he left his wallet in the office.
Simon and Ruthie arrive home and ask politely for a snack after their long day. Annie compliments them on their manners, and says she will give Happy a snack as well. Simon knows something is up because usually he feeds Happy at a specific time. Annie calls Happy to the kitchen and Happy walks in wearing the bright red rain boots. Simon is speechless and Annie tries to make Simon and Ruthie confess, which they eventually do – sort of. Simon runs upstairs, saying he has a lot of homework to do. Annie picks up the phone as Matt, Lucy and Mary walk in – and hands the phone over to Matt. She whispers to the girls that it was Dina Nash.
At the hospital, the admitting nurse still won't admit Mr. Smith without the paperwork being complete. Eric is outraged and grabs a doctor passing by who takes Mr. Smith to a room. Later, Eric finds out that Mr. Smith didn't have a heart attack – it was simple heartburn. He asks the doctor to give him 15 minutes with Mr. Smith before he tells him. Eric goes in and shows that he brought Harriet's IRS file with him, so he can take care of the case now before it is too late. Harriet and Clarence walk in, and Mr. Smith promises he will take care of it – and all of the money will be refunded to them. The doctor then comes in and says Mr. Smith will have to spend his retirement taking it easy, but he will be OK – no surgery. Mr. Smith gets a big hug from Clarence to show there are no hard feelings.
It's Annie's turn to return the sweater and she gets the same response that Lucy did – a big fat no. Annie asks to speak with the manager and the lady says that she is the manager. Annie asks to speak with the owner and the lady says that she is the owner. Getting nowhere, she turns to a group of girls looking at sweaters and holds up the shrunk one and tells them to be careful or their sweater will turn out like the one she is holding up. Annie then gets frustrated and asks what happened to customer service, thank-yous and standing by the merchandise the shop sells? The owner gets equally upset and yells that it's because of shoplifting, returns for cash, people returning merchandise after wearing it once, lower profits and higher insurance costs. Annie apologizes and the owner gives her the money for the sweater. Annie then offers to buy her a cup of offer, which she thankfully accepts.
The editor of the paper arrives at the Camden house and Matt answers. The editor apologizes and tells Matt that he was the one who placed the ad for Matt – he did it so that kids knew that cool people place ads too. Matt says he forgives him – only to have Mary and Lucy spill the beans that the only reason Matt is willing to forget it is because Dina Nash called him up. The editor is obviously pleased his master plan worked – and heads back home. Later, we find out that Mary asked Dina to call Matt – she agreed because Mary said "please and thank you."